I’ve always been a little embarrassed by my photography. When I look at the photographs I shoot, they often just scream at me, “AMATEUR! FRAUD!”
I took lots of classes to learn all the technical “rules” of photography and lighting, and how to use my DSLR when I first got it in 2012, but honestly, they never really stuck. There were too many of them for my feeble mind to hold onto pretty much any of them, except the rule of thirds. I could not explain to you what an f.stop is, or especially how the math works out for it when there’s different length lenses. I just mess around with the camera, previewing photos as I go in the viewfinder, until I find the shot or shots that look “right” to me. I’m sure even professional photographers who do know the rules end up doing this anyway. Now I just shoot using auto settings for the sheer joy of it and try not to worry about being “professional”. I try to just be an artist using a tool to create, and suppose art history will figure it out after I’m dead.
Through trial and error, I’ve learned enough things, I think, to create a decent image every now and then, but I’ve never had the confidence to offer prints of my photos for sale, as most of them never even seemed worth the hassle or expense of printing to me, let alone having value to someone else. The idea of contemporary photographs having value as NFTs in the era of Instagram is an even bigger stretch for my brain, but one that doesn’t cost me anything to explore, unlike prints.
I just think that: the best way to display an NFT is on a screen, right? So why would someone waste wall/screen space on media that can be so easily printed and put in analog frames? Prints can be analog and not lose quality, so why would anyone waste screen space on anything that isn’t digital media that can only be digital, like animated NFTs or NFTs with music? Also, I feel like in the era of Instagram, digital photography is the most practiced art form we have in our global society because with everyone having a cell phone camera at their fingertips, almost everyone participates to some degree or another. It’d be pretty hard to find a person who’s never taken a photo with their phone.
The only argument I’ve heard against this is that “no one else has your eye”, which I suppose is true, but I’m not convinced my “eye” is any good, let alone good enough to charge money for. I look at Diane Arbus and Sally Mann and their voices are so clear in their works. Is it even remotely clear in mine? Friends, patrons, and strangers on the internet have told me my “eye” has value, but I’ve always been too scared to put myself out there to test their opinions in case they were wrong or just blowing smoke up my ass.
I’ve been trying to take artistic photos for my websites, various online projects, and social media since before I even owned a digital camera, but it wasn’t until 2003 that I tried to take an artistic photo of something other than myself or my own kid. It was this one, “Knickers & Shit Kickers“, now available as a clean NFT on Hic Et Nunc in an edition of 13.
Blake was working in a photography store and was allowed to bring home the floor models to experiment with. One night, he brought home three cameras to mess around with, and two of them were boring, standard, digital snapshot cameras, while the third, a Pentax Optio 33LF, also a snapshot camera, had built-in, duo-chrome filters. Being digital, you could preview your shots on the viewfinder through this filter, so I spent the night taking selfies with the self-timer first, in a denim skirt with the blue duo-chrome filter, and then wearing red, lace bloomers and a red and orange, fiery feather bra using the red filter. I loved how those photos came out, so afterward, I just walked around our apartment, looking at things through the filter and snapping photos. Inevitably, nature called and I just brought the camera with me to the bathroom and set it on the counter while I did my duty to God, the Queen, and my country. Upon dropping trou’, I realized that my underbums were red gingham, my Doc Martens were black, and the toilet was white, creating an opportunity to use the red duo-chrome filter in an unexpected way.
“Knickers & Shit Kickers” inspired an idea for a larger project that never came to fruition due to practicality and anxiety, where I thought it would be interesting to take photos like it of other women, ideally in public toilet stalls with on-the-spot consent, to show a variety of natural, documentary juxtapositions between what we wear privately (our panties) vs. what we wear publicly (our footwear). I still think it’d be cool, but it’d take an enthusiastic, female partner-in-crime to pull it off and I’ve never had any volunteers.
The next photo I chose to turn into an NFT is “Feminist Killjoy“, also available on Hic Et Nunc in an edition of 13. I exclusively use Robert Bateman, plastic coil-bound, softcover notebooks for all my sketches, ideas, plans, passwords, and notes and when I start a new one, the first thing I do is decorate the cover somehow.
In October 2019, I made these labels to decorate one such cover and when they were finished, I thought the image of just the labels on their own, with feminine journal writing in the background, was powerful, so I snapped a photo. This image has been used for profile pics and banners for social media and online storefronts several times since, but this is the first time it’s ever been offered for sale.
The third, and final photograph I’m offering for sale at this time, is “Dead Bunny“, available as a clean NFT in an edition of 7 on Hic Et Nunc. Straight up, this is my favourite photo I’ve ever taken because the story behind it and how it makes me feel is so spot on. This photo is a beautiful, serene funeral scene to me.
One Sunday morning in May 2012, I woke up early and let my two large & lazy dogs into the backyard so they could do their business, then hopped in the shower to do my own business. When I got out of the shower, Blake was up and annoyed that the dogs had been barking in the yard the whole time I was showering, which woke him up. He said they had been chasing a rabbit and now the rabbit was dead, but the dogs were still out in the yard, barking at it to wake up and play some more.
When I went out and actually looked at the rabbit, this was how I found it. It simply got chased until it collapsed from exhaustion and stress and died. At the same time, it looked incredibly peaceful among the dry leaves and pine cones and I thought that this must be what some people mean when they say that death is “resting” in peace. I brought the dogs inside, got my camera, and “Dead Bunny” is the result.
“Dead Bunny” is more than twice the price of my other photos because a living creature gave its life for its creation. I grew up with someone who sold rabbits for meat and pets, so I factored in the cost of buying a rabbit from him into the price as the Tez value of the dead bunny’s life. Why that value should go to me, I’m not even sure, I just didn’t want the rabbit’s sacrifice to be “cheap”. I also made it an edition of “lucky” 7, as rabbit’s feet were once considered good luck charms.
These are my initial photo offerings for sale as clean NFTs on Hic Et Nunc and the stories behind them.
Thank you so much for hearing me and looking!
